funny po-em-things...

All material ©Copyright 2005 by D X Stone

"Some pretty weird and goofy shit here. If you're going to read these, I'd advise you to wear a condom... it couldn't hurt, anyway."

 --Former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop


Goofy Poems On Eyeballs n' Such

Potato Bugs (Mr. Potatohead's Lament)
God is Big
Bad Bunnies (and other assorted shorties)
Not a Paranoid
Divining Rod
Silly Disguises
Carloan Blues
Bad Aspirin


For The Thinking Weirdo

Jesus Hangin' at the Mission
Bunji's Fingers
It Sometimes Makes Me Wonder
Whatta Lotta Laughs
The Nurse Won't Answer My Buzzer
In The Night Museum
The Puppet in the Pulpit
Naked Nun
Your Govt Inaction


Dark Matter

Hell I & II
Everybody's Waiting
Marla's Alarms
Shootin' Your Mouth Off - Ode to Ariel Sharon
Post-Nuclear Primer
Another Pound of Flesh























Bunji's Fingers


Bunji's fingers

Needles knittin'

Sittin' in the kitchen

Stitchin' up an oven mitten

As befittin' any

Idle Eskimo


Bunji's thinkin' 'bout a drink'n

Winkin' at the kitchen sink'n

Somehow thinkin'

That it's winkin' back

Or maybe not

Or maybe so

Bunji's wonderin'

About the summer

When's it comin'?

What a bummer

To be sittin' here

Is summer ever gettin' here?

Bunji's lonely

Penance is the winter

What a sentence

For a sinner

Ol' squid tentacle

For every single stinkin' dinnner


Bunji's fingers

Tinkering with

Little strings and sinkers

Dreams of little shrinking creatures

Dreams of sunshine on his fingers

And his toes


Bunji's mind is

Wandering to women

Now he's

Picturing them swimmin'

And he might as well

His igloo's uglier than hell

Bunji's mind is

Masticating minutes

There are teeth and things

Within it

Poor ol' Eskimo

He's all dressed up

No place to go


Bunji's fingers

Knitting needles

Wriggling like

Busy beetles

Beating beetle wings

Just Bunji's fingers holding back

The bitter cold

All Evil Toons, All The Time!


President Evil Online Home

  The Lovely Dick Cheney Page

  Four More Beers, Quick!


  Stoopidity for Dummies

Our Leaders Are Chucky-Dolls

 Meet the REAL Fockers!

  Revenge of the Living Rummy

 The Halliburton Horror

President Pinhead

  More Stoopider Even


Other Neat & Scary Stuff

 Site Map of Doom

Millions are Horrified!!!

 The OJ Simpson Defense Rap

The Scary News

 The Surreal News

The Bipolar Bowler

 More Funny Poem-Things

Who The Hell Am I, Anyway? 


Contact me at

All material on this site is ©Copyright 2005 by Daniel Xavier Stone. All rights reserved.