funny po-em-things...
Goofy Poems On Eyeballs n' Such
For The Thinking Weirdo
Dark Matter
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Whether
I went to the mountain to talk to the Man 'Cuz I'd heard that his word was the Word from Above I went 'cuz I wanted to learn all I can And this cat was the Buddha! A dude'a pure love! So I went to the peak and I saw the old dude He was takin' a leak--he was totally nude So I waited to speak 'cuz I dared not intrude I'm just not that rude
He led me into a chilly old cave And he sat in a lotus and beckoned to me He told me that his name was Dave And he asked what I wanted and offered me tea So I sat on a mat and I questioned the cat I had all kindsa questions 'bout this and 'bout that And this dude had the answers--he had 'em down pat I was sure about that...
So many questions I had in my head Buzzin' around like a hatful'a bees...
Whether life is meaningful Whether love is true Whether truth is lovely Whether red is blue Whether light's a wave Or just a little dot Whether it's worth asking Whether it is not Whether man's immortal Or if he's not instead Whether there's a porthole In Dan Quayle's head Whether everything began With a bang or with a pop How that argument began Whether it will ever stop Whether God's a monster Coming soon to get us Whether ham is best with cheese Or perhaps with lettuce Whether man will ever learn Whether there is hope Whether we will ever turn Our parents on to dope
I wanted the lowdown, the facts, the straight poop So many questions I spewed to the dude And I knew that this guru could give me the scoop Sitting there on his rock in his cave in the nude And when I was finished he leaned into me And he paused, yes he paused so dramatically And his olden lips trembled, and then finally He whispered to me:
"You carry your own weather in your head... GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!" --that's all the old man said |
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