funny po-em-things...

All material ©Copyright 2005 by D X Stone

"Some pretty weird and goofy shit here. If you're going to read these, I'd advise you to wear a condom... it couldn't hurt, anyway."

 --Former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop


Goofy Poems On Eyeballs n' Such

Potato Bugs (Mr. Potatohead's Lament)
God is Big
Bad Bunnies (and other assorted shorties)
Not a Paranoid
Divining Rod
Silly Disguises
Carloan Blues
Bad Aspirin


For The Thinking Weirdo

Jesus Hangin' at the Mission
Bunji's Fingers
It Sometimes Makes Me Wonder
Whatta Lotta Laughs
The Nurse Won't Answer My Buzzer
In The Night Museum
The Puppet in the Pulpit
Naked Nun
Your Govt Inaction


Dark Matter

Hell I & II
Everybody's Waiting
Marla's Alarms
Shootin' Your Mouth Off - Ode to Ariel Sharon
Post-Nuclear Primer
Another Pound of Flesh








Silly Disguises


The sunny sun, it rises

And the people rise to meet it

In their silliest disguises

They grab hold of life and eat it

Then they jump inside of cages

And grip hard onto wheels

And drive for endless ages

Or at least that's how it feels

Til they get to where they're going

Then they fix their wigs and masks

So it seems as though they're wise and knowing

Unless somebody asks them where they're going

And then they shrink inside their shirts and hide

Pretending that they've died

Pretending there's no one inside

Pretending that they're mute, or deaf

Pretending that their right side is their left

In their silliest disguises

They go out to greet the day

In a dozen thousand shapes and sizes

Slumping, glumping all the way

In their silliest and sappiest

They bounce about, competing

For title of the Happiest Chap or Chippie

East of Eden


















All Evil Toons, All The Time!


President Evil Online Home

  The Lovely Dick Cheney Page

  Four More Beers, Quick!


  Stoopidity for Dummies

Our Leaders Are Chucky-Dolls

 Meet the REAL Fockers!

  Revenge of the Living Rummy

 The Halliburton Horror

President Pinhead

  More Stoopider Even


Other Neat & Scary Stuff

 Site Map of Doom

Millions are Horrified!!!

 The OJ Simpson Defense Rap

The Scary News

 The Surreal News

The Bipolar Bowler

 More Funny Poem-Things

Who The Hell Am I, Anyway? 


Contact me at

All material on this site is ©Copyright 2005 by Daniel Xavier Stone. All rights reserved.